hello and meditations on Saturn in Pisces

Today is the second day this week that I have intended to dedicate to astrology and writing, only to spend hours consuming others' content, on TikTok, lying in bed, and writing disjointed, never-finished articles. Normally I am full of ideas and enthusiasm for astrology and writing, feeling like my day job, human responsibilities and social life are taking me away from this task. When I give myself the time, I am distracted and compulsively avoidant of making significant progress.

Today, coming off of the Scorpio new moon and Halloween festivities, I have completely lost my voice. Taking it as a sign to isolate a bit and use the time to nurture my projects, I have been in my bed since Friday morning sleeping and marinating on various writing topics and personal spiritual goals. The new moon was a somber reflection on how my first month in Spain has gone, how much I love it here and the discipline that will be required of me to stay permanently. It is exciting and easily done in theory, I crash when trying to execute.

This exact kind of paralysis is something I have come to associate with Saturn in Pisces. The transit initially brought relief as Saturn left its home signs; that sense of ease has evaporated during Saturn’s slow, retrograde laden and eclipse punctuated transit through the second decan of Pisces. I often describe Pisces as slippery, hard to grasp, the space between worlds, where subtleties are significant, where unrealities can have tangible repercussions, where what only exists in other dimensions can be heard here. Saturn’s Piscean restrictions have felt, to me, like reaching for what you want and feeling it slip through your fingers because it is fluid and incomplete; like trying to grasp liquid. Known for rewarding hard work, Saturn is asking us to bring the achievements that we can imagine for ourselves out of the ether. The energy is heavy, and steps forward feel like wading through waist deep water; however, with Pisces’ Jupiterian and mystical qualities, possibilities that we only quietly dream of are truly, very possible. 

This adds challenge in itself, because when we can feel the potential for wild success, moving towards it is scary. Taking steps towards what we want requires us to declare that we believe it is possible, and that we will accept success if it comes. With Saturn there are always opportunities to work on ourselves, and here we must feel deserving of what we seek, and be bold enough to admit that we want it. It is ever tempting to do nothing instead, to leave dreams as dreams that you can revisit anytime, never to realize or become failures. This manifestation of Saturn in Pisces that I am experiencing threatens a distinct consequence; do nothing, get nothing. Stones left unturned will stay that way forever, and if you want something in your life or in the world you must birth it yourself. Moving to Madrid was something I have wanted for a long time, and a dramatic step forward for me, but I have much more that I want to create for myself before this transit ends.

So, I sacrifice the comfortable in-between space to publish this first post. Thank you for reading!